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Thursday, January 19, 2006

Friday Wish List


Ok, I'm having my weekly Girly moment. lol They used to come daily, but now it's weekly. I'll take whatever I can get these days.

I want a shoe wall. And, I want his and hers closets. I'm tired of having to pull all my pwetties out of the boxes they're packed in, to see if they fit again. I want my own closet, and by closet, I mean, bedroom, to hang my clothes in so I can walk in and say "chello" to Liz, Amalfi and Tommy-babeh. I don't wear my "nice" clothes, which in the city would be my everyday clothes, right now, because the dirt up here is red and I don't want it to stain my expensive duds. So, they sit all lonely, sad and wrinkled in their boxes, waiting the day when we exodus this freak pad and journey to our next destination, which had better be a freaking city! lol Oh, right, I can't forget hubby's Hugo Boss sportswear (translate suits), which he almost never wears unless I force him to go to a "function" with me, where he has to dress up. So, he'll need a 4'x4' space for his collection of clothes that he never wears. I'm actually surprised he lets me force him to keep them, 'cuz he hates going to parties and anything social gives him the willies. How did I marry such a shy guy? What up wit dat?! He could probably live with a 2'x2' closet, but out of reverence for the Boss... I guess he could put his shoes in the extra space, right?

Ok, have you ever seen that show on Tool Time, (Tim Allen's old show from the 90's)? Well, if you're a fan, you'll know what I'm talking about. When I saw that dufus build his wife a motorized closet where her shoes marched out to the tune of Toy Soldiers, (I think, correct me if I'm wrong), I just about dropped to my knees in worshipful prayer, tears streaming down my cheeks, begging God to bless this po' chile' wit a shoe closet like that. Just think how happy my Amalfi pumps would be in there? And they could sit down the road from Liz, Marc, Mike (Kors, of course, duh!), and Alfani and say, "chello!" , whenever they wanted to. Oh, yeah!

So, I want to know, where's my shoe wall?! Where's my motorized, automated, talking closet?! Btw, if I had a talking closet, sorry, but I would not want Tim Allen's voice talking to me. Let Hugh Lorie, Pierce Brosnan, Antonio Banderas or Maurice Benard, say, "Good Morning, Beautiful, and what would you like to slip into?", to me. Oh, yeah. How could any woman have a bad day when they hear those sexy voices talking to her first thing in the mornin'? Oh, Lordy! Mmm-Mm. I'd know I'd just died and gone to heaven if I woke up one morning to see my big-ass closet-bedroom with motorized shoe wall/closet, with all my outfits seperated by color and then designer, and my shoes NOT rubbing up against one another, but politely standing apart, yet next to each other like good little soldiers, all in their perfectly shined and bling-elated glory. (And that's probably just when I'll see it, too: right before or right after I die, with my luck).



Ok, snobby, gimme moment of the week is over.

7 Comments:

At 9:39 PM, Blogger Leann said...

Jessica,

You paint such a vivid picture. I'm afraid if I had a closet like that I'd have to go on a shopping bing to fill it up!

Oh wait......that's not a bad thing is it?? LOL

 
At 10:39 AM, Blogger Jessica said...

LOL, Leann, that's the whole point! lol That's WHY you get a big huge shoe closet, so you can get more shoes! lol You're too cute! Thanks for visiting, again. :)

 
At 2:10 PM, Blogger Kim said...

This is hilarious! I have a dumpy old closet filled with nursing scrubs, Reeboks and Nikes of various ages. And clothes that are in there just so I can say I have clothes in the closet.

Major LOL - now I want shoes, baby! And of course I'll have to buy them at Nordstroms because they sell "wide" sizes (where the hell did I get wide feet? Didn't God think wide hips were enough?)

 
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