My Migraine Battle: On The Forefront

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

I have this big decision to make. It's one that I don't feel that I should have to make. You know, when I was in business, I would make a point to help out some less than fortunate people who really needed our help-whether it was allowing them to make small payments on our services for however long they needed, or giving a generous discount, etc. There were times when we even helped out for free and just took it as a tax write off for those who really, really needed it and were obviously too poor to afford our services. I felt like that if you give it comes back to you and truly it did. Whenever I did that, we ended up with at least 10 referrals from those customers to their friends who'd do business with us-and pay!

Anyway, here I am, with state insurance, and unable to find a neurologist in all of northern Cali that will take it. I've called everywhere from the Bay area to Redding. It's totally amazing. My doc's tried to get me in to the teaching hospitals and they're so booked up that they couldn't even make an appointment for the next 3-4 months! And that's to make an appointment. It would be 2-4 months after that that I'd even get to go in for the appointment.

So, I'm stuck. Completely stuck. There's nothing more frustrating than not having any choices or control over your life or your body.

My doc, a gp, has found a pain management doc that she trusts. I don't know if he's specifically for head and neck pain or just general pain mgt. Anyway, he doesn't take state insurance, (of course), but he did offer to teach her how to do the trigger point shots. Those shots are what I need. When I get those, it decreases my migraines by about 85%, and when I get a migraine, it doesn't last as long and it's not as intense as it is now.

So, here I am. Do I wait until possibly the end of the year to be free from the pain? Or do I put my trust in someone inexperienced in doing these shots? It's scary because the shots go into my brain. I am so desperate to be out of intense pain right now that I just feel that I don't have a choice. The decision is made for me, really, I guess. I guess I just have to hope and pray that it doesn't puncture an area that shouldn't be punctured. I have problems trusting people already, but it seems that I'm continually challenged in life to trust people I don't really know (although, this doc is fabulous and I feel like I know her, because she's told me about her life and kids, etc.).

What to do, what to do? It's agonizing to have to make decisions like this.

posted by Jessica @ 4:04 PM