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Monday, December 12, 2005

You're So Vain...

"I walk, invisible
No one sees
A pill to swallow
Makes me disappear
But, they couldn't see me anyways"

So, I actually got dressed today to go to a teacher conference at school. And, I'm putting on my new belt that I bought about a month and a half ago, when I discover that it's already too big! There's half a hand's width between my belt and my belly. Yay! I'm so happy, because I've gained alot of weight from inactivity over the past two years.

The weight where I feel sexiest AND healthiest is at 130-135#. I'm 5'71/2", so that's a perfect weight for me.

I've gotten up to 165#'s, which is very big for my frame and build. Ack! So, because of the evil (?) side effects, I've lost 20#'s so far, which brings me very close to my goal weight. Wow. When I get back to my goal weight, I'll fit in all my clothes again. Right now, I mainly hang out in some generic-ish jeans (I think they're gloria vanderbilt) and sweats.

I have visions of Calvin, Anne, Amalfi, Emma, Giorgio, Valerie, Ann Taylor, Tommy, Ralph, Donna K, Hugo and all my other favorite 'friends', dancing in my head while I dream these nights. Ahhh. Back to normalcy. Not that I can exactly wear them in this little hick town where Levis and Wranglers reign supreme. Besides, the dirt is red, seriously, around here and it turns everything it touches, red. And washing the clothes doesn't take it all out, because the iron is in the water too. It sucks. I know, I sound like a total snob. Well, I am one, so there! lol

So, which wonder drugs are taking away my appetite? Duragesic, Adderall, and the dilaudid all have appetite suppressants in them. So, there's another side effect of my wonder-drugs. At least this is a good one...for now anyway.