My Migraine Battle: On The Forefront

My Devious Plan

Tomorrow is the day before my next trigger shots. Last time, I ended up having to get a narcotics treatment after the trigger shots, because I went in with a migraine already and getting the shots on top of that, just sent me over the edge.

So, this time I have a plan. I have two dilauded suppositories left. I am going to take those tomorrow and take some phenergan. In effect, I'm going to knock myself out for the day on purpose. In this way, I hope to go into my TS appointment with only a minimal migraine, if any. And, I will take my imitrex with me to the appointment in case I need it afterward.

At my last TS appointment, I nearly passed out when the needle went in and it wasn't my doc's fault. I told them that I didn't have a migraine, when in fact it was at a 7, because I knew that I needed the shots and she won't give me the shots when I have a migraine, for obvious reasons. Because, I have to rely on others for my transportation, if I couldn't get my shots on that specific day, I would've had to wait another week and I was desperate for some relief, even if it does only last a week.

So, on Tuesday morning, the morning of my appointment, I will take fioricet and 800 mgs of Ibuprofen at home. Then, if I need it, after I get my shots, I will use my last remaining injection of my precious Imitrex. I think that I can get through this with that combination of stonishness (I just made up a new word, lol).

My head has been absolutely killing me for 3 days, fluctuating between pain levels of 7-9. I thought about going to ER yesterday, but instead opted to take my fioricet and phenergan with a wine cooler. This is not healthy to resort to these means to get relief from pain. It means, I strongly believe, that I am seriously undermedicated and undertreated. I hope this will change when I see that pain management doctor. This will be my last trigger shot until then. I'm worried, because they only hold down the pain and nausea for two weeks. I'm going to be in real trouble by the time my appointment rolls around. Big trouble.

However, I have recently accepted my situation. I realize that I can't worry any more about what could happen. After all, what could be worse than what I'm going through now? And I can't fear anything. I don't fear anything. I am living anyone's worst nightmare. What is left to fear after that? And, if this doctor turns out to be a prick, well that's nothing new, either. It's funny, but inside, I have complete peace because of those things that I just mentioned. You have to laugh that it took this circumstance to rid myself of fear and worry. lol

posted by Jessica @ 11:15 PM